Ottawa (CP)
Disturbing new information was released today by the Department of Foreign affairs regarding the treatment of William Samson during his 31 months in a Saudi Arabian Prison.

Apparently, as well as being shackled, handcuffed, beaten and sleep deprived; Samson was also forced to watch the new Ben Affleck Jennifer Lopez movie Gigli no less than seven times.

"It must have been horrific," said Foreign Affairs Minister Bill Graham. "And to make it worse, during the brief moments he was allowed to sleep, they piped Celine Dion music into his cell around the clock. Oh the humanity."

Graham said that his department has protested Samson's treatment in the strongest possible terms, indicating that while the torture violated the International Convention on Human Rights, the Gigli reruns and Dion music "Displayed the lowest depths of man's inhumanity to man."

Samson has requested privacy since his release, but is apparently recuperating by watching the Discovery Channel and listening to webcasts of CKUA radio.